Real Name: Joe Cocomo.

Lives in: Somewhere in time. . ..

Originally a dumbass redneck maple syrup farmer in the wilds of Vermont, One night five years ago, a crop circle appeared on Joe's syrup farm and pissed him right the heck off (A crop circle in wheat or corn is one thing, but maple trees?) and the next night he drove his tractor out into the sugar bush and waited for the culprits with a shotgun. Apparently, the culprits were rather amused by this, because Joe, tractor, shotgun, and all were kidnapped by aliens that night and dragged halfway across the universe and dropped, tractor and all, onto a strange city on the planet Xebon 4.

On Xebon 4, after being dropped out of his kidnapper's spacecraft, Joe came crashing through the temple roof of a sect whose deity was traditionally depicted by a rune which was shaped just like the John Deere logo and generally pictured against a yellow field. Joe resided on Xebon 4 for two years as "high priest from the sky" and keeper of the sacred reliquery (Which now included the mangled remains of the tractor, if not the shotgun), but left Xebon after a n irate taxi driver shot him with a so-called "stupid ray" which had the paradoxical effect of making humans smarter; Joe's new-found intelligence allowed him to best his former followers at a game similar to tic-tac-toe and thus win the contents of the temple treasury, and with the money he bought a flying saucer of his own.

After two years of exploring the universe, Joe decided it was high-time for him to get home and, at the very least, check his e-mail. On return, Joe had an unfortunate accident while landing his craft, and has since had a number of terrestial adventures while waiting for UFO parts to arrive UPS from The Great Beyond.

My website is jcocomo.fotopic.net

Shouts

Coming soon.